Well, it’s time for changes at Stuck in Your Rut. This blog started as my husband and I working to make sure that we weren’t getting stuck in a rut in life. However, deep down the real reason that this blog started is because I needed a kick in the butt to take the blogging step.
As I have mentioned before, I struggle with fear. I don’t like to try new things. I have to force myself to do it. Starting this blog was a big step for me. I had wanted to start a blog for years. In fact, I started several, but always abandoned them because I felt inadequate and expected to fail.
My husband is one of my sources of strength (God is my first). I love when he lets me know that he believes in something that I want to try (words of affirmation is my love language). So, when he agreed to be a small part of the blog it gave me the confidence to give it a shot.
Now, several months later, I can honestly say that he has posted a couple posts and I appreciate it, but I went about this all wrong. The real thing that I want to write about is marriage with a little of parenting and other life things thrown in. I always shied away from the topic because I felt like a marriage failure.
I am ashamed to say that in my past I was not a good wife; in fact I was a horrible wife. Between my husband and me, we drove our marriage almost to the point of divorce, for a lot of couples they probably would have chosen to end it. While I don’t want to neglect that my husband did have wrongs in our marriage, the majority of our problems were mine.
Several years ago while in the middle of piecing our marriage back together God began to give me a heart for wives and marriage. This seemed odd to me because I had not been a ministry minded person in the past and being concerned about the topic of marriage, other than my own, had never really entered my mind. I had always struggled in getting along well with other women; I always felt so judged.
But, through the trials that I have worked through, I began to see a way that maybe God could use me to help others like me. I mean, after all, God brings beauty from ashes right? Maybe he could turn my ashes into something beautiful…
Going through our trials I have become somewhat of a student of marriage. I have read more books then I can count. While there are amazing and extremely helpful books written by women who had their stuff put together from the start, there were also those books written by women who learned through their failures.
That’s where I am. I have learned (and am still learning) through my failure. I would love to be able to influence and help other women to avoid the trials that I experienced in marriage. I have three daughters and I want them to be more educated and make better decisions than I did.
And, that brings us back to the blogging changes. I will be working over the next several weeks to update this blog (and give it the attention it needs) to restructure it for a new purpose. I hope that you will hang in there with me and “pardon the dust” (I hate that phrase) because I know better things are to come.